Wednesday, September 17, 2008

An old blog post, I wanted to share it again

Confessions


OK, I’ll admit it. I like Fall Out Boy. Yes, and I listen to Good Charlotte, And NSync, so there!

But I have been thinking, technically because of FOB, about being Emo. I hate labels, and that is just one more header I seem to fit under. So I came up with “The Emo Project.” Basically I want to put together a book about my depression, only in an interesting way, and with scrapping.
I want to get pictures of me taken being traditionally “Emo,” with black clothes, a hoodie pulled up over my head, a chunk of hair across my face, tear-stained with the dark eyeliner… And in classic poses too, an over-the-top look at the “Emo” label. The journaling will be honestly the ways I’ve felt because of my depression and anxiety and insomnia, pretty much an exaggeration of a part of me. It’ll be all hard and black and white. I want to end this part of the book with pages about me, the real me. I may be emo, but I’m a mom and a wife, a scientist, an artist… I’m an emo punk hippie yuppie basketcase, and I’m not shamed of it.

I’m hoping to get the book out to some mental health programs, like Active Minds which aims at the destigmatization of mental illness in young adults. I want to share my story, letting prople know that you don’t have to write poetry in a coffee house to be depressed, and depression does not define you. I’m depressed, and I need to be on medication to keep even a loose hold on my sanity, and I do have lapses and bad days, but I don’t let it define me or define the clothes I wear, the music I like or the way I live my life. To some Emo is a scene, to others it’s an inescapable way of life.

OK, rambling again, but I was hoping to share this because I want some help making a decision. Do you think enough of the scrap community that suffers from a mental illness would be willing to contribute to another chapter, double layouts of their own depression and their coping mechanisms?

Just curious. I don’t want to profit off of this, I just want to share my experiences and knowledge about my own diseases with other people. If I can just help one person deal with their own issues or go get help then I will have done my job. I hate being depressed and I want to save the world from feeling like I have.
June 15th, 2007 at 8:22 am

Tuesday, September 16, 2008

Bored at work

I'm bored. Bored bored bored. And so I blog.

I'm reading the second Dexter book, and it is quite different from the second season (the first season followed the first book up until the ending). Excellent read, graphic in some scenes but hell, it is about a serial killer.

I ordered a drop spindle and some fiber. Just waiting for it to arrive.

I want to keep up work on Jack's sweater, maybe with my parents around I can work on it more next week (they can help ward off playful kittens and overly helpful toddlers). Doing the second sleeve, then get to join the sleeves to the body and when that is all done, onto the hood. Maybe I'll work on Brett's socks too...

Quilt retreat coming up, the in-laws do it every year and I have yet to go. I will now though. Quilting (I'm working on the HP paper piecing quilt, though I only have 4 blocks done, thank you kitten and toddler), scrapping (which I haven't done in about a year), knitting and spinning. Three days to get away and craft, and only $100 for lodgings and food. Good deal.

Random thought I had and plurked about a little: Slytherins like myself are obviously Yankee fans (and I am), Hufflepuffs are obviously Cubs fans (as is Satchel from Get Fuzzy), but I'm not sure about the others. I think Griffindors would probably like the Red Sox, since they have the rivalry thing going on (both Slytherin-Griffindor and Yankees-Red Sox). I'd say Ravenclaws wouldn't be bothered with baseball, but they like Quidditch enough. Any suggestions?

Oh! I forgot to mention, the kitten of which I spoke is Petie, he is going on 12 weeks and we've had him for 9 days now. Cute but evil, like all cats. Got him for the baby's second birthday, which is a week from tomorrow.

OK, killed 8 minutes so far, let's see how far I can get in the next 30 before I leave work.

Nah, I'm not that evil. OK, maybe I am, but I'll spare you, dear reader, anyway.

Plurk me if you want, good ol' JenthePotionsMaster, as always.

Signing off from the vector core.